Hoffman dies at 46, the world reacts...
Hoffman was born to play disheveled and frenetic roles like Bangs. Could he nail a more pristine, put together role? Sure. He proved that when he took on Capote and The Master. But he shined when he played roles like Lester Bangs or Pirate Radio's The Count. He didn't just "captivate" in his roles, he made you want to be those people. When I watched Pirate Radio, I wanted so badly to be crazy DJ on a boat floating out in the sea, illegally exposing kids to rock and roll. I still blame that movie for my desire to live on a houseboat. Most importantly, though, when I watched Almost Famous, I wanted to be Lester Bangs. I'd like to live slightly longer and fry less of my brain on drugs, obviously. But I want to be that good. I'm not sure anyone else could have made that role so lovable, though.
In the movie, Hoffman perfectly embodied Bangs. Bangs was a messy, under-appreciated, cough syrup addled rock critic. He didn't care about much, but he loved music and the way it could make him feel. Bangs seemed to have a soft spot for even the bad stuff, the stuff people ignored, the stuff I'd rather just not even waste my time writing about. He may not have liked it, but he loved writing about it... as if his reviews would somehow force these so-called musicians to better themselves. Bangs also had a soft spot for one kid who was desperate to be like him, except slightly less addicted to drugs. In real life that kid would turn out to be Cameron Crowe. In the film, that kid was William Miller and the scenes in which Bangs rambled on and on to the wannabe critic were some of the best.
Most days, I feel like William Miller. Greg Kot and Rob Sheffield are my Lester Bangs. But, someday... someday I want to be someone's Bangs. Bangs died two years before I was born. I can see pictures of him and read his biography, Let it Blurt (which I highly recommend), but I could never experience him in person like William/Crowe was able to do. For me, and plenty more in my generation, Philip Seymour Hoffman was as close as we got. Hoffman's face and voice will always be what I see and hear when I read old reviews from Bangs. He not only introduced a new idol onto my radar, but he became that person and became one of the very few actors I kept up with. Honestly, as much as I loved William Miller, I have no idea what the kid who played him, Patrick Fugit, is up to now. I kept up with Hoffman, though. I adored his work on Hunger Games and, as an accidental TV writer, I was thrilled for his upcoming leading role in the new show Happyish. Once-a-week doses of Philip Seymour Hoffman? Yes, please!
Much like Bangs, though, Hoffman is gone now. "Wasted potential" is a phrase often thrown around a lot when someone magnificent dies too young. It's been used on Hoffman already and was probably used for Bangs, too. I hate that phrase. It's so bitter. Much like money, I'm not sure you can take potential with you once you go. Plus, Hoffman leaves behind a resume of some of the best films and roles in history. His time wasn't wasted at all. He put his time on earth and all his potential to damn good use. What the hell are you doing? What the fuck am I doing?
Hoffman was like a friend I wanted but never had. He played an idol I'd never meet and, incidentally, became one himself. There is a row of movies on my shelf that show fully all of Hoffman's potential. All I can hope is someday, somewhere, someone has a shelf to show off all mine.
Rest in peace, PSH. You'll always be the best in my book.
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